A handful of dreams Page 9

  much, she wished she had not come, for it only made it all so much more painful. Whatever happened she didn't want to see Theo. She drove round the back of the house, taking the scarf and walking with the dogs jumping up at her, to the kitchen. It was empty, so she walked through into the hall and Ermyntrude came running, her face frightened. 'It is God's answer to my prayer,' the Creole maid said. ' He is so ill I am afraid. I know not what to do.' What's the trouble, Ermyntrude?' Cilia had grown to know and like the Creole girl during Anthony's stay and was startled at the fear in Ermyntrude's face. ' It is him,' Ermyntrude wailed. ' He not eat or get up for four days. He run with water. He not speakhe just toss around.' Cilia knew who him must be, yet she could not believe it. Theothat strong arrogant creature ill? It didn't make sense. Obviously the girl was really frightened, and living on the island she must often see people suffering from fever, so surely ... ? ' You sent for the doctor, Ermyntrude?' ' NoI afraid. Him ... he and the doctor not good friends. Him has no time for the doctor, he says.' ' That's nonsense. When you're really ill . . . I'd better see him. Take me to his room, Ermyntrude.' Together they walked down the corridor and the Creole girl opened the door and stood back so that Cilia could walk through. But her legs seemed to have lost their strength 118 for a moment as she stood there, unable to believe what she saw. Theo, in white shortie pyjamas, was lying down on top of his bed, if the tossing and turning could be called ' lying down'. He was moaning and groaning and the sweat was pouring down Iiis,face, his eyes were closed. ;. ' Theol' Cilia exclaimed, horrified, and turned to Ermyntrude. ' Get a flannel from the bathroom, soak it in cold water and wipe his face.' Ermyntrude looked terrified, so Cilia smiled. ' Look, I'm going to phone the doctor at once, so get a bowl of ice-cold water and a flannel and have it ready for me.' ' C'est bien,' Ermyntrude, looking relieved, said. Cilia got through on the phone with surprising speed. The doctor was out, at the hospital. So she phoned the hospital; The doctor was busyin the operating theatre. ' But he must come,' Cilia said, her voice desperate. ' Mr Randall is terribly ill, unconscious.' ' I will tell the doctor. He will come as soon as he can.' ' I mean it... he's seriously ill,' Cilia said again. 'But of course, mademoiselle. I will tell the doctor at once,' the oily voice promised. Cilia hung up. She could do no more, yet was that enough? How long did an operation take? Back in the room with the twisting tossing body on the bed, she carefully wiped his face with the cold cloth, feeling sick with fear. What ought she to do? If only she knew morel Looking at his grey contorted face with the sweat running down in small rivulets, she had never felt 119 so useless. Suppose . . . just suppose Theo died! It was as if a hand gripped her throat, stopping her from breathing. If Theo died . .. It seemed hours that Cilia stood there, bathing the unconscious face, praying that she was doing the right thing, blaming herself for never having learned first aid. What was the illness? she wondered. She asked Ermyntrude, who stood hovering in the doorway, her face streaked with fear, but the Creole girl didn't know either. Cilia wondered if she should ring Joannabut she would still be asleep; besides, it was unlikely that Joanna would know anything about this kind of illness. ' Wet his face,' Cilia said to the Creole girl, who came forward, her eyes huge with fear. ' I must ring the doctor again.' The same oily persuasive voice answered her. ' But of course the doctor has been told. He is a busy man and . . .' ' I want to speak to him. I must speak to him. I insist on speaking to him 1' Cilia's voice rose furiously. ' Do you realise Theo might die?' she almost screamed. ' If you don't put me through to the doctor I'll . . .' i She heard the unknown woman sigh heavily. ' All right, I will tell the doctor that you wish to speak to him. What name may I give?' / 'Cilia Askew. I'm a neighbour of Mr Randall's . . .' ' Miss Askew?' The oily voice brightened. ' Oh, you must be . . .' ' Yes, I am,' Cilia shouted angrily. ' I'm the sister whose aunt left her money to . . .' 120

  ' I'm sorry. Miss Askew, I didn't mean to offend,' the woman said politely. ' Hold on and I will put you through to the doctor.' There was a crackle and then a deep voice spoke. ' Miss Askew? I understand you are almost hysterical about something?' It was a pleasant voice, friendly but slightly amused. ' So would you be hysterical if you could see Theo Randall,' Cilia said angrily. ' Look, he's unconscious and I think he's dying and ...' Her voice stopped, for it was shaking, and her eyes smarted again. If only she could make them understand! ' Theo? Theo Randall? Don't tell me he's ill. Probably it's a hoax and you've fallen for it.' ' Listen, Doctor,' Cilia said, her voice quiet now as she fought for control of herself, ' I know Theo is normally healthy, but he hasn't eaten anything for days and he's unconscioustossing about on the bed, moaning, the sweat running down his face. I don't know what to do!' ' I'll be with you in twenty minutes,' the doctor said, and she heard the click as he replaced the receiver. She put down the phone, trembling, for the doctor's immediate response had shown how very ill Theo must be. But at least the doctor was coming. She hurried along to Theo's bedroom and took over from Ermyntrude. ' The doctor is coming,' she announced. ' It is good. I make some coffee?' ' I'd rather have a cold drink with lots of ice.' ' It shall be,' Ermyntrude said, and turned away, 121 looking relieved at having an excuse to escape. To Cilia it was an endless twenty minutes as she bathed the sweating face and looked at the man before her, tossing and turning, moaning and groaning, so very different from the man she . . . hated. But that was no longer the truth. This was the man she loved . . . and there was nothing she could do about it. Then she heard the sound of the bella man's voice and Ermyntrude's voice, and in a few moments the doctor was there. At the time she hardly noticed himjust the man who had come to save Theo's life. ' Go and relax,' the doctor ordered. ' Leave Randall to me.' ' I didn't know what to do ... I don't know what's wrong with him . . .' The doctor's hand was gentle on her arm as he took her to the door and put her outside., ' You've done very well. Don't worry. Go and sit down and have a drop of brandy. I'll come along as soon as I've finished.' ' Finished?' she echoed. He smiled and she saw for the first time just how sun-tanned his face was, in real contrast to the fairness of his hair. ' An injection that'll calm him down. Nothing to worry about.' A wave of relief went through her and she obeyed, her legs absurdly shaky as she went to sit down. Ermyntrude came hurrying. ' The doctor says some brandy,' Cilia told her. ' It is good. I will get it. Your legs, you put them up,' Ermyntrude said briskly, finding a small 122 chair and fussing over Cilia. As she sipped the fluid that stung her throat and then seemed to circulate comfortingly down her body, causing her stomach nerves to relax. Cilia closed her eyes, resting her head on the back of the chair. There was no doubt nowif there had been any doubt at allthat she loved Theo. Loved him far too much. She must have dozed, for she woke suddenly when the doctor walked in, sat down opposite her. ' He'll be all right,' he said briefly. Cilia stared at him. ' You're sure?' The tall thin blond man smiled. ' Quite sure. It's an attack of a tropical fever. He's had several attacks before, but he gets so furious with his own weakness that he won't send for me. Not exactly an easy man,' 'the doctor said with a laugh. ' And that's no lie,' Cilia laughed as she felt the wave of joyous relief sweep through her. Theo was all right. There was no need to fear. ' Let me introduce myself,' the doctor said. ' David Temple.' He held out his hand and shook Cilia's. And you?' ' Cilia Askew.' Oh yes . . .' Cilia's cheeks burned. ' Of course you've heard of me,' she said, her voice defiant. ' I'm the sister who stole Joanna's share.' He laughed. ' You know what life is like in a place this size. They've got nothing to do but gossip and what they don't know they invent. No, what I heard about you was that you'd looked after Theo's nephew, a boy you'd flown out from England with and that Fiona thought you'd kid123 napped.' 'You know her?' she asked. ' Who doesn't?' ' How is it we haven't met?' ' Because I only got back yesterday. I've been on leave, flew over to Scotland to see my parents.' ' Then if it had been yesterday, I wouldn't have got you?' Cilia sounded dismayed. Chuckling, he shook his head. ' No, but there was someone in my place. I'm glad you got me, as I know Theo.' ' The maid said you were not
friends.' ' Who can always be friends with Theo?' David asked. ' He's a generous man. Has contributed a lot for the hospital, but he expects everything to be done his way. That's where we fight. He may be a first-rate architect, but he doesn't know what a medico needs. It takes some doing to prove to him that his ideas, while perfect, are not practical. How do you get on with him?' ' I... we ...' She was taken aback by the question, but soon recovered and managed to smile. ' Oh, we fight all the time.' David stood up. ' Good to hear of a lass who'll refuse to lick his boots! Theo is a great guy, but there are times . . . Now I must be off, but I'll be sending a nurse down as more injections will be needed, and I'll be in to see him later today.' Cilia stood up quickly. ' What can I do to help?' ' Actually nothing. If he sweats badly, wipe his face with a cold cloth as you did.' His face was suddenly grave. ' It's a good thing you phoned for me. A few more hours and it might have been too late.' 124

  As she went out to his car to see him off. Cilia shivered despite the heat, for the sky was a cloudless blue again.David Temple waved goodbye and Cilia went back into the house, wishing the doctor could stay, feeling so helpless if Theo needed help. She went to Theo's room and stood in the doorway. His body was still, he had stopped moaning, but he was still unconscious, the sweat pouring down his face. She bathed his hot skin, seeing that the little curl of hair had been squashed down by the sweat, and she stroked it gently, trying to make it stand up, but it collapsed. Sitting by his side, wondering when the nurse would come and how long it would be before Theo was well. Cilia was quite startled when someone stormed into the room. ' What are you doing here? You've no right. ..' the angry girl burst out. It was Fiona! As usual elegantly beautiful in a white trouser suit, her hair elaborately coiled, Fiona's cheeks were bright red with fury. ' Why didn't you ring me and tell me Theo was ill?' she demanded, almost shouting. 'You have no right to be here. I'm the one. As you know, we're very close and soon will be announcing our engagement.' Cilia stared silently. It was not true, she told herself. Fiona was making it all up. ' Theo is tired of the way you chase him,' Fiona went on. ' Tired to death at the way you make it plain you're after him.' Unable to help laughing, Cilia saw Fiona's anger deepen. ' I asked youwhat are you doing here?' Fiona demanded. ' Theo will be furious!' 125

  Fiona's anger seemed easier to cope with than Theo's, Cilia thought. ' I found one of Theo's scarves in my car, so I brought it over,' she said, pointing to the scarf on the chair. ' Theo's scarf?' Fiona said sneeringly. ' A likely story, but it doesn't work. That's Colin's scarf. I know because I gave it to him last Christmas.' ' Colin's?' Cilia was startled. It made sense, though, for she had driven him in her car quite recently about town. Now why hadn't she thought of Colin? Because Theo ruled her thoughts? The worst part was. Cilia realised, that Fiona would tell Theo and make the most of it, and Theo . . . Cilia put the damp flannel in the bowl of water. Glancing quickly at Theo, she thought he was not sweating so much as before. Perhaps the injection was having a good effect. She looked at Fiona. ' A nurse is coming to give injections,' she told her. ' Dr Temple says Theo will be all right.' ' 0 course he will, now I'm here. I'm used to nursing this. Now, get out,' Fiona said rudely. Cilia turned and walked out, down the corridor and to her car. She felt strangely weak and angry angry with herself for making such a mistake as to take Colin's scarf. She looked down and saw it in her hand. Without realising it, she must have clutched it as she left the room. Fiona would tell Theo about itand imply that Cilia had deliberately muddled the owner of the scarf in order to use it as an excuse to call on him. How stupid had she been? Cilia thought crossly, then realised something else. As the doctor had said, if she hadn't 'found Theo so ill, it might have been too late. 126

  CHAPTER XIII

  ; Cilia drove straight back to Joanna's, only remem. bering as she drove up in front of the house that she had planned to go to town and find a solicitor so that she could fight Theo. But it was different now. She couldn't do it while Theo was ill. All was quiet, so Cilia went and lay on her bed, switching on the electric fan that sent a delightful cool air over her. What was she to do? She could imagine the grapevine passing on the words: Cilia was nearly hysterical about itshe had gone to see him with some stupid excuse. Of course he was all right as soon as Fiona got there 1 Who had told Fiona? The oily-voiced girl at the hospital? Wondering if she should tell Joanna the truth of what actually happened and let there be a second side of the story? But Joanna at lunch had a migraine. She looked worried, but kept saying she was all right. The phone bell rang once and she came back to the dining room, looking puzzled. ' I've just heard that Theo is ,illsome kind of fever.' ' Yes, I was . . .' Cilia began, but stopped as Joanna ran her hand over her forehead. ' Gee, it's bad this time. Mind if I go back to bed, Cilia?' / ' Of course not. I hope it'll be better soon.' Joanna smiled. ' I hope so, too. I expect Colin will ring you up as it's cooler.' ' Not much cooler,' Cilia said with a smile. 127

  'You'll get used to it,' Joanna reassured her. We all do.' As Joanna left her. Cilia was thinking that she would not be on the island long enough to get used to it! Surely Aunt Lil's conditions had not been for years here, only months? Colin did ring later and Cilia went out with him. He was his usual charming self, thoughtful, considerate, but asking her if she had thought about his proposal. Of course I have,' she said, turning to smile at him. The moonlight shone down on them where they were parked above the coast with its huge rocks and racing-in waves. ' But I'm sorry, Colin, I'm very fond of you, but...' ' I wish that word " but" had never been invented,' he sighed. ' It spoils everything.' Cilia had to laugh. ' I think it's the most important word in the world. It makes you think.' ' Perhaps you're thinking too much,' he said. She turned to him. 'Colin, please! I enjoy going out with you, we get on well together, can't we just enjoy being together without thinking of marriage? At least not for a while.' He kissed her gently, a kiss that meant nothing to her. Nothing at all. ' I love you,' he told her, ' so I'll be patient.' And so started a new phase of Cilia's life. Paul, bad-tempered and tired, bringing more and more work home. Joanna obviously worried about something, for her migraines grew worse and worse, and Colin taking Cilia out, being the good friend she needed but not pestering her. It was hard to hide her interest in Theo's illness, but the grapevine 128 kept them up to date. What puzzled Cilia was that never once did she hear her name mentioned, so it looked as if Fiona had told no one at all, which was rather surprising. And so the days passed and Cilia could not make up her mind. Marrying Colin would solve many problems, but if Theo was right and she had to have one of the trustees' permission, then she had better write to Peter Kent at once. She could hardly say 'Yes' and then have to tell Colin why she couldn't marry him. So she wrote the letter and going outside on to the shady terrace, found Joanna waiting for her. ' What's wrong with you. Cilia?' she asked. ' These days you look so miserable.' Cilia felt like saying: ' So do you and Paul', but decided not to as it might be something private. ' I am worried,' she said slowly. ' You see, Colin has asked me to marry him.' Joanna looked surprised. ' I didn't think he was the marrying kind. Do you love him?' ' That's it.' Cilia sat down and stretched out her legs as she smiled. ' That's the whole point. I can't decide. I like him very much, very much indeed, but...' She laughed. 'Poor Colin 1 He's been so patient and gets quite cross because I keep saying " but ".' 'You don't love him?' asked Joanna. ' What is love?' Cilia asked evasively. 'I'm happy with him. We never quarrel.' . ' How boring married life would be if you never quarrelled. Making the quarrels up is the sweetest part of it.' ' I hate quarrels,' confessed Cilia. HDE 129

  ' Then why do you and Theo quarrel all the time?' ' He does the quarrelling. He's impossible.' ' Talking of Theo, I think we ought to go and visit him,' Joanna said, standing up, looking as beautiful as usual with her red hair and lovely skin. ' Go and see him?' Cilia was startled. ' Why?' Joanna looked amused. ' Why? Sheer politeness. We're neighbours and old friends and yet we've done nothing to help him in his illness. The least we can do is to go and cheer him up in h
is convalescence. I hear he's very depressed.' 'Theo? Depressed?' ' Yes, come along. It's the least we can do. I've got some fruit he likes,' Joanna said. ' I'll get it.' Reluctantly, yet wanting to go at the same time, Cilia led the way to the car. It was a beautiful day, but still very humid. Joanna said little as they drove to Theo's house. As usual Cilia's heart gave an extra throb at she saw the beautifulas she thought itbuilding. One of her handful of dreams, she thought. A dream that had turned into a nightmare. Theo was sitting on the grass under the huge sunshade. He stood up and waved and the two girls walked across the lawn, Joanna smiling, Cilia trying to look impersonal. ' Well, this is a nice surprise,' Theo said, his usual sarcastic smile hurting Cilia. ' Long time no see. Ermyntrude,' he shouted, ' cold drinks, please. Do sit down, Cilia, your legs look as if they're wobbling.' They were I Cilia thought as she hastily sat down. If only he didn't see everything! 130

  ' This is a real surprise,' Theo went on. ' I began to wonder if I had any friends or neighbours, because no one called to see the poor sick man.' He smiled as he spoke, but there was a tiny thread of bitterness in it. ' We . . . we heard you weren't allowed visitors,' Cilia explained. Theo turned to stare at her, his eyes suddenly cold. ' Now who would be stupid enough to believe that? I've been longing for visitors. Thanks be, Fiona comes every day, so I'm not completely alone.' Ermyntrude came out with the tray of glasses and iced water and orange squash. She gave Cilia a quick, rather frightened look that was puzzling. The Creole girl looked for a moment as if she was wanting to speak, but then she turned and almost fled across the grass. Theo noticed and said: ' I don't know what's the matter with Ermyntrude. She's so different since I've been ill. Crawls around as if she expects me to chop her head off.' Cilia thought she could imagine how Fiona spoke to Ermyntrude and that was probably the trouble, only she could hardly say so, for it was obvious that Theo thought the world of Fiona. It became even more obvious as they drank and chatted, for Theo was saying he would have died if Fiona hadn't found him so ill and sent for the do"tor. ' 1 wasn't conscious, but you'd have thought Ermyntrude would have had the sense.' Cilia opened her mouth, about to say that Ermyntrude, had been scared, knowing how much 131 he disliked the doctor. ' And Fiona's been a wonderful nurse,' he went on. ' Of course I had a real nurse, too, but Fiona just sat and bathed my poor hot face.' He chuckled. ' Sounds odd, doesn't it, a man of my age having his face washed 1' ' Very kind of her,' Joanna agreed, finishing her glass and smiling. ' And you're really well, now?' ' Just outrageously weak. I was furious when I got better and leapt out of bed. You would have laughed,' he said, looking challengingly at Cilia, ' if you'd seen me collapse on the floor. My legs were absolutely useless, but they're better now.' ' You've . . . you've seen the doctor?' Cilia asked nervously. It was obvious that Fiona had not told Theo that it was Cilia who had found him and who had sent for the doctor, thus saving Theo's life. On the other hand, it also meant that Fiona had not mentioned the scarf, or accused Cilia of having deliberately lied about the scarf in order to have an excuse.Theo looked amused. ' I never waste his time if I can avoid it. He came when I was unconscious and once as I was getting better. I don't need to see him. An obstinate bloke, gets on my nerves.' Cilia longed to say,' And you get on his with your arrogance ', but luckily she stopped herself in time, since it would have betrayed everything. Driving home with Joanna, Cilia said, ' Did I tell you that Theo says I can't marry anyone unless he or Peter Kent approves?' ' Good grief, surely not? Isn't that carrying it a bit far?' Joanna asked in a sympathetic voice. Personally I don't believe it, so I've written to 132